Saturday, January 15, 2011

Twins and adoption

I love how the B symbol on the blogs looks like a baby carriage. Its probably just me.LOL anywho I digress.
 Last night I dreamt I had twins. A boy and a girl. That would be so super awesome if it came true. If we have a singleton child I feel it will be lonely as there are no young children in either of our families. DH is the youngest of 5 brothers. The next brother up from him has the youngest kids on their side and they are 9 and 12. the next 2 cousins are 15 and 18 then the other 4 cousins are over 23. So noone to play with there. Im the youngest in my family with 2 brothers. Only one is married, but his wife is 49 this year, so i guess theyre not having kids. So thats it, no kids at all..and i think we will only have one pregnancy once the IVF works. I really can't see us trying again once we get our baby. Mostly the costs involved, but also the worry of an abnormal baby.

Id always thought if we didn't get pregnant we could just adopt. Turns out thats not easy in Australia. The govt is so good at helping single teenage parents that they keep their babies these days. Don't get me wrong, im happy they have the support and stay with their families, but it does mean theres very few to adopt. Even the families who can't look after their children and get them taken away very rarely give up their parental rights in my country. I read a statistic that each year there are less than 50 children adopted in Australia. The average time to adopt a child here is 7 years. if you want an infant it can be over 10 years!! Even the overseas adoptions are difficult with a lot of redtape and huge costs. the average wait for overseas adoption is 3 years and the average cost is over $20,000.

DH and I were discussing our plans the other night. I mentioned adoption and he said he really doesn't want to raise someone elses child. If we can't have our own, he'd rather be childless. I guess being childless wouldn't be soo bad. Its what we are used to afterall. I guess in a few years people will stop asking us when are we having kids.  Still..Im holding onto hope that we will get lucky with our next IVF and get our miracle!!


LisaB said...

I am sad to hear that it's so difficult to adopt and I'm sorry to hear DH feels that way about adoptions. *hugs* I really hope you get your miracle with your next IVF cycle! Sometimes the first one just doesn't work for whatever reason :( Hang in there!

Kez71 said...

Thanks Lisa, we really hope it works second time too. Good luck yourself..I understand you are in the 2ww..eeee so fingers are crossed for you!!

Kim said...

Hubs and I had the same discusion recently, "what if".....I hate the idea of living child-free, but like you said, we have for so long, thats what were used to anyhow.

Here's to hoping IVF #2 is your lucky cycle!